Forty-Nine Candles

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I am pretty sure this story is not what most people expect when they go to the category marked 'Illustrated', and I admit that some of the way through I too was thinking: 'Where are the illustrations?' Most of the time I really didn't care because this is a little number as sweet and hot as Cher singing The Shoop Shoop Song. 

Yes! it's in his kiss, LOL. 

Falling for a Kiss - Tilly and Elmer FlashbackX Book 2

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In the FlashbackX series, Tilly and Elmer, a Midwestern couple in their sixties, reminisce about their awkward but passionate high school romance. Elmer knew that tradition required him to kiss Tilly on the third date. He wanted to, but when he found her dressed as a vampire for the Halloween dance, his well rehearsed strategy took a scary turn. They're still laughing about it fifty years later. 

The Tilly and Elmer stories are about a couple in their sexy sixties and are illustrated with delightful naïf coloured drawings by the author, Gene Clements. Some stories are for sale at a very cheap price, this one is Free!

Miss Congeniality

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Available from Hive.

OK, LOL, Miss Congeniality is not erotica but it is great fun and I need some gentle romance on here. Besides, I had some thoughts which I wish to write up and this seems like the best place. 

Miss Congeniality looks like the perfect example of a postfeminist film. Now I am supposed to be in favour of feminist erotica, not erotica which says, Whatever. Get over it you dull second wave wimmin who can't be bothered to pluck your chin hair, so you might not expect me to say: "Yes! go and watch this romcom in which a dork-y FBI agent is transformed into a lovely Beauty Queen and realises her inner Barbie." However ... 

Big Daddy Comes Knocking

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As the joke goes: "Is sex dirty?" "If you're doing it right."
 
Lois says goodbye to husband Alan with a perfunctory kiss and goes off to her boring job, where she is further irritated by her juvenile colleagues and their lackadaisical attitudes. Then the phone rings ... it's 'him'! "I told you to never call me on this phone!" she whispers. 

The sound of his voice stirred her in places Lois didn't want to acknowledge. Cue - smokin' hot and dirty sex! Hot Mama Lois is going to get Big Daddy for breaking the rules and calling her at work, and get him hard ... er, so to speak <snerk>.

How Can Erotica Make the World a Better Place?

Guest post by AussieScribbler

I am a great admirer of Aussiescribbler's work, although I have only so far reviewed his Lusting While Dusting as unfortunately his characters can be careless about safe sex. Aussie's stories make me wet, usually because I laughed so hard I wet myself, although they are also hot, with heroines who are nearly as appealingly quirky as he is himself. We had a great discussion by email recently about my review of a cartoon I found sexist (admittedly I was in a very bad mood at the time I wrote that review, LOL), and he has kindly agreed to reproduce his thoughts in a guest post essay on the subject. 

I disagree with lots that he says! although I admire the way he puts his argument. We are not in disagreement about this blog, as it's mainly aimed at young people. The internet gives us easy access to such a variety of sexualised material and I want to provide a filter here for people who are anxious about what they might come across. Aussie has always been one of my most supportive friends as I search for examples of good sexual practice, for people who would like to start with an understanding of sex that is fundamentally respectful.

I remain very proud that my werewolf story ("depraved filth" - unsolicited one star Amazon review <snerk>) made one reader put her entire collection of werewolf stories to the back of her virtual bookshelf. I think many people's reading habits ought to be healthily repressed and they should be made to go through all the fine examples of realistic, fun and feisty frolics which I have collected here for their delectation instead of being allowed to stuff themselves with bad fiction. But then, I am a mom. I also believe in freedom of speech and I love a lively discussion so I let my child read Enid Blyton and I encourage you to read what Aussie has to say about kinds of erotic writing you won't find reviewed on here.

AussieScribbler's work is on 
Smashwords, his blog
funnyboners and 
how to be free.

I believe that erotica can play a useful role in promoting a healthy society but perhaps not quite in the way you might think. You might think I'm suggesting that by writing erotica which depicts healthy and responsible behaviour we can gently nudge some readers away from perhaps dangerous or oppressive sexual behaviour. This may make sense in terms of providing a good example to young people, but erotica can do more than that.

Sexy Summer Sounds - In Your Afterglow

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Sexy Summer Sounds - A Walk in the Park

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Scorchio! as the Fast Show weather girl used to say. Don't burn your fingers on the latest from Kingswoman and Charlie the W@*king W@*ker - or any other body parts.

Jenny takes A Walk in the Park, to air her enormous boobs, and finds an unexpected friend in the public toilets. "I don't think there's a straight man alive who would make it through the toilet scene without exploding," gushes one fan.

This is another X-rated boyzzzone story from Kingswoman and Charlie. I have known a lesbian or two (wink) but never one who behaved like Jenny and Karen! Women have secretly confided to me that they enjoyed this exceptionally dirty story; mostly though it's a Carry On Wanking ... I mean Walking for men. LOL. 

As a bonne bouche ... er, as it were (<snerk>), try the spoof article on a flasher who gets a business award, illustrated by this delightful pic in the St Helens celebrity news.