This blog isn't about sex. It's about great sex! I set it up because you only live twice, once in your dreams.
This blog is a portal to the wonderful world of web-based erotic writing. It also serves as a filter: finding stories for you to enjoy without worrying. Use both the reviews and the labels to help you identify stories which will suit your tastes. If the idea of ‘oral’ makes your stomach churn, click on ‘romance’ in the label cloud. Use the rating system: from 0 for nonsexual to XXX for eyebrow raising. (Just your eyebrows will do, thank you, sheesh!)
And use the biggest sexual organ in your body: that’s your brain, dumbo! Which bit of you do you think processes the little messages from your nerve endings in a kiss and releases the endorphins that make you go Whoopdidoo! As you read the reviews and choose stories, as you follow up other stories from those outside of this site: Think before you Click. Come Home quickly if you’re not sure about what you find. Some stories out there are far out on the wild side because humans are inventive beings –not always in nice ways.
Remember too that these are fantasy erotic stories and so the sex is always sizzling. In another life, just being close to someone you have always liked is usually enough. They won’t need a 10“ wonger or GG breasts to turn you on.
Take care of your sweet self and enjoy your dreams.
Tuesday, 29 December 2015
The Truth about Hymens and Sex
Thursday, 24 December 2015
Selection Box - a Burlesque Christmas Party
I always love taking along a friend who hasn't been to burlesque before. The 'O' of their mouth as they realise how much fun it is. The shaking with laughter, the gasping with amazement, the sparkle of sexiness. Even though they know, because I told them, they always comment on how seeing women of all different shapes and sizes makes us feel good about ourselves.
Burlesque is about watching performers who are freely being themselves, and that makes you feel free to enjoy being yourself. Frankly, it is just a sign of how sexist and sick our society is, that there isn't a burlesque show being put on in a top venue every weekend for women (and men) to go to and enjoy seeing how sexy and smart and super every woman is. (Yes, you too. If you don't believe me, go to a burlesque show and find out.)
Wednesday, 23 December 2015
Mobile Home for the Holidays
Monday, 21 December 2015
An Angel's Wish
Angel Waiting, by Todd Krasovetz |
Both this and a story I plan to review for tomorrow as a runup to Christmas, have a background theme of homelessness. At this time of year, many of us are 'driving home for Christmas'. I have personally been homeless on more than one occasion. I know that people who are 'homeless' are often not people you would expect to have trouble getting housed. This month, as I gratefully plan for a merry Christmas with my young daughter and our cats in a safe warm happy home, I am donating to a local homeless charity. I hope the small donation helps someone be warm and safe even if only for a couple of days.
Sunday, 20 December 2015
Serena Williams
Serena Williams in Vogue. |
Serena Williams in the Pirelli calendar. |
In the comments on my blogpost on calendars, someone said they think Serena Williams has 'too many overtly masculine features'. This has been a common comment on her muscular physique and was one of the reasons Annie Liebowitz asked her to pose for this year's Pirelli Calendar, which looks to question the very kind of photos of women for which Pirelli used to be famous.
curl4ever is a keen admirer of muscular women (see my review of his writing), and he wrote these thoughts about that comment.
Friday, 18 December 2015
Her Secret Confessions Parts 1 and 2
Kawasaki Ninja featured on CrotchRocket.com. |
The anxieties of the central character are well portrayed in these purportedly biographical pieces. As young women, we are heavily schooled into concern about our sexuality. On the one hand, we are given the impression that the world is full of naughty men waiting to pounce on us out of the undergrowth and slaver all over us. Plus, we are made to feel it's of the foremost importance to be closer to 'virgin' on the social spectrum than 'whore'; I mean actually more important than scoring a Nobel Prize with our school science project.
The predicament of a young woman who feels turned on by a hot man is a well drawn backdrop in these stories.
Wednesday, 16 December 2015
Calendar Girls ... and Boys
Well, as Christmas approaches and you are desperate to get something for Auntie Rhoda, you may be turning to the calendar shops for an inoffensive gift. Cats? Landscape photos? Cartoons of cats? Landscape shots with cats in them?
Probably not a nude girl-y calendar, although the old-fashioned staple of every garage has undergone something of a revolution.
Monday, 14 December 2015
Summertime Sex Ed
Thursday, 10 December 2015
FAWC6
NB I haven't been able to assign a rating to these stories as I haven't read them yet myself. Past competition entries have gone right across the range from 0 to XXX. Check them out, vote and see if you can guess who wrote which one. (I provide the full list of participating authors at the end of my blogpost.)
Monday, 7 December 2015
My Night with an Internet Stranger
Monday, 30 November 2015
Exploring the Ring of Kerry
Monday, 23 November 2015
1st International Welsh Cabaret Festival
Beautiful hats and fascinators by Looby Creations |
People worry that burlesque is just an excuse for sleazy strip-tease. In fact it is a witty caricature, simultaneously sending up our fears about sex and celebrating real women's bodies and our sexuality. With its gender bending politics and intellectual rather than physical strip-tease, cabaret and burlesque is an ideal filler for a theatre like the Sherman to put in between earnest new plays and the kids' Christmas shows, providing something that's adult and emotionally mature.
Burlesque is the mirror opposite of strip-tease. In strip-tease, women are the objects of Desire; in burlesque we are the subjects of our own desire to enjoy showing our bodies and our selves. The 1st International Welsh Cabaret Festival showcased this particularly well with the inclusion of several male acts - who were not stripping for women in a reverse strip-tease. They were often engaging with more feminine sides of themselves, e.g. through balletic movements - again providing a subjective celebratory vision of feminine sides to identity.
Burlesque is a liberatory subversive artform, of the kind the critic Bakhtin called carnivalesque.
OK, enough of that, now for what I thought of the actual festival:
Tuesday, 17 November 2015
Consent
I run this blog partly to provide some fun that encourages safe sex, and shows young lads that it's possible to get a lot more in life if you ask for it politely than if you rudely try to blag women into giving you pictures of their boobs for your phone. (See my review of Peter Morgan's work.) I also run it to encourage young women to have confidence. If we as women confidently say No more often, men may realise that No does mean No and f*ck off when we don't want them bothering us. Yes, men must do more to respect women's consensual rights. As women we can take courage and be more assertive.
From Everyday Feminism: link to rest of comic below. |
Sunday, 8 November 2015
Beat-Off Buddies
"Fishnet Stockings" polish as reviewed on HerCampus. |
Tuesday, 3 November 2015
An Anal Fantasy for You
In this tender appeal, he spells out his passion for arse. If you were wondering how to go about anal sex, here is a poetic way to find out. Rimminglover writes about what he would like to do to his lover and lingers in detail on how he would go about fingering and fucking her.
Sunday, 25 October 2015
Mouse's Maiden Voyage
Craig Revel Horwood - notorious for harsh one-liner critique |
Darcy Bussell - brilliant insights delivered with kindness. |
curl: I am very excited to introduce you to an exceptional new author on Literotica, Gorza. I've loved both of his first two stories. Today I want to direct you to Mouse's Maiden Voyage.
Naoko: Yes, yes darling, but his footwork, and that habit of dropping the shoulders. You must keep the topline ... oh sorry, wrong script.
Thursday, 22 October 2015
Les Ballets Trockadero de Monte Carlo
International Welsh Cabaret Festival
Image from Eventbrite |
Roll up, roll up! the burlesque is back! Here's information and tickets for the festival (13th/14th Nov).
Previously I have reviewed the burlesque here, here and here. I totally hand on heart recommend it as a hilarious heart-warming night out.
Running over three days, at the Festival, you can:
- Go to the shops - there will be stalls with all sorts. (Seriously - all sorts!)
- See the New Talent awards (Fri night).
- Attend a day of vintage make-up, dance and circus skills workshops (Sat).
- See the Gala Show!!! (Sat evening).
I'm sure going to be there!
Wednesday, 14 October 2015
Safe Sex - it doesn't have to be like this
People immediately think condoms when the words 'safe sex' pop up. Well, you can have a lot of fun with condoms.
There are also A LOT of activities you can engage in for which you don't need a condom. They are safe and enormous (enormous! - wink) fun. Expand your sexual repertoire, have lots of fun and play safe, LOL.
Here's a quickie about how to have fun with a condom.
Phew! *panting* that was really ... safe (wink) LOL.
Friday, 9 October 2015
Using a wheelchair
Yayyy! Go and read, vote - and give feedback. I know I need to edit my own story, so I am really keen for feedback.
NB I have previously reviewed electricblue66's art here. The pictures he mentions in his story are on his Tumblr blog. Sorry about the quick lecture I put in at the start of this review - back to flirting soon, I promise. For those who want to think about writing in a more responsible manner ...
Thursday, 8 October 2015
National Poetry Day
The poem comes from a 'verse medley' by Alfred, Lord Tennyson called The Princess. This is an odd story, it starts with a group of young people who are inspired to tell each other a verse drama about a heroic Prince. Young Lilia, the daughter of the house, challenges the young men to it:
I wish I were
Some mighty poetess, I would shame you then,
That love to keep us children!
They compose a poem about a great Princess who separates herself from the world in order to pursue learning. But it only leads to 'tears idle tears', gurllllzzzzz (wink - that famous poem is also part of The Princess medley). A Prince falls in love with her, and when she rejects his suit, a terrible battle ensues, her brothers and various assorted hunky Princes are all dreadfully wounded, then finally she agrees to be a good wife and mother instead.
LOL, it's all very Victorian. Nothing like that could happen today OF COURSE! (wink).
I am always struck by the way Lilia and Ida (the Princess) are depicted as attractive and charming because of their wit and intelligence, how Tennyson shows their frustration at not being allowed to develop their thoughts ("you ... that love to keep us children"), but in the end this is not the Victorian way - love means never having to think any more, apparently.
Thursday, 24 September 2015
Odd-shaped balls
TBH, LOL, when the rugby is actually on the tv, I have got no time for idle flirting. There are many passions of the human heart, and rugby is the ruling one of mine. Well ... there's whisky too, but you can so easily combine whisky with watching. Watching rugby! Sheesh. Anyway, while I am watching matches, the closest you will come to me making a pass is if I take you out to the park afterwards and demonstrate my spin pass while shouting at you to hold the line.
However, there is no denying that a sport requiring such a high level of fitness produces beefcake that is well worth ogling. Plus, there is a lot of mileage to be got out of rugby terminology - which is curiously well suited to innuendo.
Monday, 14 September 2015
Summer Lovin': Sweet Summer Nights
From Modern Paleo Warfare blog run by two lads who like cooking but are not online any more :( |
Another highly reliable writer in the Literotica story competitions is SamScribble. I greedily look out for his stories, as they usually have a bonne bouche in them by way of a yummy recipe which his lucky characters get to eat. Here he has really come up to scratch with a delicious scallop dish. There is a bed - of course <wink> - of white bean puree, some spicy action <snerk>, fishiness and a couple of round juicy scallops.
Sunday, 30 August 2015
Summer Lovin': Hot Hilary
It's up (wink nudge), it's hot (<snerk>), it's the Literotica Summer Lovin' Contest!
The summer has been blighted back in Blighty by near constant rain. I spoke to someone in Brighton the other day who said the animals were lining up two by two on the seafront. So lie back, relax and have a read about what it ought to be like.
Wednesday, 22 July 2015
Anna's Milk Ch. 03
Having said that, there are some really irritating typographical errors. FFS! Get a copy editor already. I can't bear that reading something so good should be spoilt by such an easily fixed problem.
This seems like a good place to make a small remark about editing. There are two kinds:
- copy editing - cleaning up minor typos and grammatical errors. (Or mistakes like writing 'Anna' when you meant 'Moira'.)
- beta reading - someone goes through your story for you and advises you that huge chunks have to be edited out (*sobs*) because they are just a distraction from the main story arc, or that huge chunks have to be rewritten with more descriptive detail, or that the main character is a sadistic basturd not a Dom and you should consider counselling not becoming an author.
Now, back to Anna's Milk.
Earth, wind and fire - this story has got it all, and a great horn section (wink).
Wednesday, 15 July 2015
How To Do It
Pic by David Jablow - check his website to buy the doodler and see his other pics |
Another great blogpost here by curl4ever. (Not all of whose own stories have safe sex! but I'm sure he will write some more hot ones for us soon - pretty please?)
Naoko has been encouraging you to explore your writing talents. I thought I would provide some resources I have found helpful, culminating with a review of one of my favorite stories, Six Characters in Search of Erotica by glynndah.
Thursday, 9 July 2015
Nude Day Erotic Story Contest
Everyone posts on Literotica for free, so give them something back in the way of an honest vote - and comments. Authors on Literotica highly value thoughtful comments so do take the time to let them know what you think about their competition entries.
As a rule, better stories go into the contests because the authors who enter are ones who regularly go on Literotica and are serious about their writing. It's well worth having a look, checking titles and links and seeing if there are stories on there you think you will enjoy. (Pssst, link to the complete list here!)
Tuesday, 7 July 2015
100th post! Apologia pro Opus Meum
From SmashCutCulture, a cultural studies blog |
Friday, 3 July 2015
Muse-ings
I'm going to celebrate with poetry!
When I started this blog I was riddled with insecurity and lack of confidence. I used to come online, laughing and flirting and pretending to be totally The Thing. The truth was, if I had had a poem dedicated to me back then, I would have run in terror. I wouldn't have understood that I was good enough for such warm appreciation.
It was a long journey for me to gain confidence, to get a better idea of how strong a person I am. If you are someone who thinks you aren't clever or pretty or funny enough, or otherwise an attractive person, this blogpost is for you. I thought that too when I started writing, and now I have got poetry dedicated to me online. If you had told me that would happen when I started with blog review #1, I would have jumped for joy.
Monday, 29 June 2015
How to be Beautiful in the Fashion Industry
This post follows on from the previous post reviewing electricblue66's art. His art celebrates the diverse beauties of bodies while photoshop is used here to airbrush them out.
Friday, 26 June 2015
Beginning Last Wednesday
Tuesday, 23 June 2015
Thanks Mom!
Pic from Facebook |
And ... I hope he had some Trojans of his own! cuz his mom put a pin right through this one. Maybe she really really wants grandchildren!
Make sure you're safe. Use a condom that's within the Use By date, hasn't been kept in a hot back pocket or knocking about (wink) in the bottom of a handbag for a few months, is still in the sealed packet so no chance of the rubber being corroded ... and which has not had a pin put through it, LOL.
Here are some fun selection packs of condoms, easily available on Amazon. You can just buy one of these for your kids and leave them discretely in the bedroom (wink).
The Après Ski Mix, what every sporting man should be sporting this winter. |
- Billy Boy Fun Selection 12 pack @ £9.49 (and free delivery!)
- Durex Selection of flavoured condoms (36) @ £7.10 - apparently they taste great, although one disgruntled customer said he only got 12 "and if you like sex, that's not a lot."
- And for those looking for winter wear, the Après Ski Mix: 21 condoms, 4 different brands @ £9.99.
Sunday, 21 June 2015
Hot and Hairy
Artist Madison Mcclain |
Wednesday, 17 June 2015
Put a Sock On It
Sock and pussy. |
"Mississippi's new sex education law prevents teachers from showing teens how to use condoms. However, they CAN show kids how to protect their feet through correct and consistent sock use," says Sanford Johnson. He says he doesn't mind whether you wear athletic shoes or dress shoes (wink) as long as your foot is protected.
Wednesday, 10 June 2015
Hot Summer Reads
@ $2.99 this is a total bargain, and even more, will offer you a gateway into the writing worlds of these ten authors. You couldn't ask for a better introduction to the best of the proliferation of prose available at Literotica. If you want to try out a sexy story but are anxious that you may bite off more than you can chew (unlike the women in The Hole In The Basement Wall LOL!), check out these tales and follow up the writers you like.
Not all of these stories are safe sex. By rights I can only review two, but I am going to sneak in a third one. Yes! for only the third time on here I am going to break my safe sex rule because one of these stories is that good. Oh, and I will give an honourable mention to a fourth because it's mostly safe sex.
Friday, 5 June 2015
Barbie Parody
Normally I am adamant about the safe sex rule on here. Even long-term married monogamous church-goers have to be using a condom at key moments: no spills in your thrills is The Rule. These videos in which Barbie is an alcoholic single mother of four dolls whom she pretends are her little sisters, are chocka full of unsafe sex! but I figure that they offer such a dire lesson about bad behaviour in general that they will make you reach for that little bit of reliable rubber.
Tuesday, 2 June 2015
I used to hate exercise
Partner-friendly abs exercises here. |
Second on my list of erotica that I just have to tell the world about is a POEM. I am not ordinarily a poetry kind of person, but for ten years, this was the ONE AND ONLY poem on my favorites list.
Friday, 15 May 2015
Gladiator
A marble relief of two female gladiators, at the British Museum |
When Naoko invited me to contribute a review, I knew my first choice immediately. It is an extremely well-written, two-chapter historical piece which develops female-female relationships with great skill and sensitivity. In line with my personal reading preferences, the protagonist is a strong, smart, and capable female warrior. I think the official title of "Gladiator" might suggest a male-oriented story, but the historical note makes it clear that female gladiators were a part of Roman history.
Monday, 11 May 2015
Curlever on Brawna
I am grateful to him even just for introducing me to Brawna, which is a site I didn't know about. Brawna is full of fun stories about strong women. I mean strong as in can bench-press significant weights, who have legs bulging with muscle and who may even spend their weekends role-playing as orc maidens, wrestling adoring men to the ground as well as other orc maidens. Any little lady out there who is constantly putting herself on diets because she thinks all men prefer the slender willowy look should rush over and read a few of the paeans on Brawna to muscular women.
(I will just take this opportunity to remind you that research shows, if you go on a diet, you will put back on more than you lost shortly afterwards as your body hurries to make up for what it realises is going to be a starve/feast way of living. Exercise is a great deal better at getting the extra poundage off - I find cycling especially good although I try not to lose too much weight in case I also lose my dimple. The one in my cheek. My facial cheek! Anyway, just click on BBW if you don't yet realise a lot of men adore big women.)
Friday, 8 May 2015
Thursday, 7 May 2015
Catullus - Ode to Lesbia
A Classical Classic seems like an excellent starting place. Here is Kingswoman reading the Latin poet Catullus's poem to his mistress, Lesbia. As this is proper classic published smut, Kingswoman has been able to upload it onto Soundcloud, where she has a collection of poetry readings rather different to the material she performs on Literotica.
Wednesday, 6 May 2015
Hysterical Literature
Not women reading erotic literature - necessarily. Each woman reads her own choice of book, while sitting at a table. Meanwhile, a Hitachi vibrator slowly disrupts her reading with pleasure until she comes to orgasm.
OK, before I get into the art-y fart-y bit, let me assure you, it's erotically exciting to watch the women. The tension mounts as they start to stutter and lose control, and you can't help laughing with them as they finally explode into inarticulate joyous orgasm.
Monday, 4 May 2015
All That Jazz - First Time
From DHGate |
Here's my second in this set of audio reviews, this time I'm looking at another perfect (ho ho) story by that consumate professional: TheRavenFox. Perfect - review here, was written by a participant on Gone Wild Audio. This story was written by TheRavenFox herself and is up on Literotica.
From TheLingerieAddict |
Tuesday, 28 April 2015
Hurry Home!
This is a hardcore FemDom story. Frankly if I wanted to find a textbook example of how far you can go and still be having safe sex, I couldn't have commissioned a better one!
Sunday, 26 April 2015
Audio Smut
From Vectorstock |
There's a proliferation of smutty short stories online. Maybe Roland Barthes was wrong when he proclaimed 'the death of the author'. However, the playful interaction between listener and writer on audio stories reveals what Barthes meant by this provocative statement.
Friday, 24 April 2015
The Wasp of St. Judith's
Tuesday, 14 April 2015
Disney Princesses
From Fanpop |
If you thought Miss Congeniality was an unlikely candidate for this blog, your jaw must be hitting the floor now, LOL.
In this unlikely blogpost I am going to argue that the Disney Princess has come a long way from her first incarnation: Snow White ("If you let me stay, I'll keep house for you. I'll wash and sew and sweep and cook.") Disney Princesses are one of the earliest means by which children come to an understanding of romance and adult relationships. It might be helpful to think back and consider if your attitudes to sex and love today were influenced by those entrancing films.
Plus, the films are beautiful. One of the bonuses of having a piglet is that I get to buy all the classic Disney films on BluRay. (Although I want to add that piglet maintenance is unfortunately not all about slobbing on the sofa with some jelly and icecream and Beauty and the Beast, so you should wear a condom until you are really sure you want to spend your life kneedeep in shitty nappies).
Sunday, 12 April 2015
Banned European Safe Sex Advert
Hahahahaha! This is so hilarious.
Friday, 10 April 2015
Perfect
From thegeekiary.com |
This story voiced by TheRavenFox is at the top of the Hall of Fame audio stories on Literotica and I can see just why. TheRavenFox is a consummate professional and her audio tracks are in a class above much of what's available on what is an amateur site. We are jolly lucky that she likes recording so much she is willing to put up free tracks on Literotica and also Reddit's Gone Wild Audio. It's not just the title of this story that is 'perfect'!
This particular story was written by Steady and posted on Gone Wild. Originally it was an M4F story but TheRavenFox naughtily asked if she could voice it, and when Steady offered to re-write it as F4M, she said she wanted an F4F. I have personally long recognised the erotic potential of Loki, the prospect of a female Loki seemed totally delicious! and so it proved to be ....
Sunday, 5 April 2015
White Scut - review
Rabbit Netsuke from auction |
I adore this little gem of a story, this bizarre erotic horror tale by that Master of the Art: Oggbashan. It makes me want to go 'tee hee hee!' with my hand over my mouth (which is how Japanese people laugh, as it's uncouth to show your open mouth in Japan). This tiny twisted intense tale truly is horrible and erotic, it's like a netsuke. It's Japanese in its sexy weirdness, the exquisite writing in perfect contrast to the grotesque story, like the delicate lines in Shunga (Japanese erotic art).
As spring sprungs all around, remind yourself why April is called 'the cruellest month' by reading White Scut. Not for the faint-hearted!